But I’m HUNGRY!!!
This is my sweet dog, Windsor. He hates this little muzzle, but it is the only way I can get him to eat the right food. You see, my neighbor (the one who gives good gifts on sticks with Tesco bags) is always putting huge plates of milky pasta in our back yard for her cats to eat. And Windsor, when he compares his dog food to that pasta, ALWAYS prefers the pasta! So, if he can get to the pasta, he eats the whole plate and then comes back in the house and promptly throws up. Yeah, it’s a mess. He just doesn’t want the good food. And this is what I have been learning about in my own life…
Last week, at our Thanksgiving conference, Dave Patty talked about being a pilgrim. We looked at passages from when the nation of Israel was in their pilgrim years in the desert, and there is one particular concept that has stayed with me for the past few days. In Exodus 16:1-3, it says that the Israelites were in the desert for one and a half months before God gave them manna. They started to grumble about being hungry and talking about the pots of meat that they had when they were in bondage in Egypt. In Deuteronomy 8:3, it says that God MADE THEM HUNGRY…and THEN he fed them manna (food which they or their fathers had never known). I’ve been thinking about this. If God had not made them hungry first, they would not have been so thankful for that strange, new food that fell from heaven. They would have continued to look for the pots of meat that they were used to, and anything other than that would not have satisfied them. But GOD MADE THEM HUNGRY and THEN He gave them NEW FOOD.
I’m like this. I continue to reach for the same things to satisfy my physical, emotional, and spiritual hunger. Many times, those things are NOT the best things…they are the food of one who lives in bondage. But, they are the things I know. They are the things I’m accustomed to and the things that I habitually look for when I’m hungry. God has had to make me hungry on a number of occasions in order to introduce me to a new form of nourishment, and for me to see the goodness in it.
I think He did that in the process of moving me to Slovakia. I was eating the food of my personal Egypt. But God led me to a desert for a while…and I was so hungry. When He started giving me “manna”, that trail of sustenance led me to Slovakia. I’m sure that if I had not been hungry, I would not have ended up here. I never would have chosen to leave the world I knew and go to a world of so many unknowns. I am so thankful for that hunger now!
This process is continual. I’m amazed by how I fight off hunger. The very moment I feel it, I think I need to rush off and find something to take that pang of discomfort away. And of course, I usually reach for whatever is closest, most convenient, familiar…and even in the world of food, I know that it is not best to go that route. It takes time and effort to find the more healthy option. And for some reason, I don’t tend to think the healthier options are as tasty as the familiar food. Maybe I need to feel more hunger??
And when it comes to emotional soothing of whatever kind…it’s the same. I reach for the familiar, the most convenient. And I know that it does not lead to the most fulfilling comfort. At the end of a day, it’s so much easier to turn on the TV, reach for a book, or call a friend than it is to sit with my needs before an invisible God. Maybe I need to feel more hunger??
These are just my thoughts lately…and I’m reminded of what Jesus said in Mathew 5: “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.” I pray that I would not fill myself so completely with the most convenient or the most accessible or the most habitual things in life…but rather I would learn to embrace hunger and let it lead me to God’s manna.
